I'm dead tired, but from the very best things. Normally, all I'm good for by 10:19pm is binge watching Netflix, and maybe when I read this draft tomorrow I'll still agree that yep I should have stuck to [insert your guilty pleasure TV series because I'm literally too embarrassed to tell you mine]. But for tonight, I need with everything in me to do this one thing for me. I knew when we put a little more on our plate by way of me working part-time from home, that writing would become much more difficult but even more necessary for my well-being. So here I am with a puppy asleep on my lap, writing...at my worst time of day to write. I love writing from about 6:30am to about 2:30pm and then my brain says quit. But today I fight my brain.
When planning and scheduling there are a few types of people, those who hate it at all costs, those who shoot from the hip, and those who meticulously plan every minute. I used to be that meticulous planner. I used to be such a clear and linear thinker. Send me postcards and sweet nothings, Brain, I've missed you while on your vacation to wherever you are. Miss you, wish you were here! Oh to think with my pre-pregnancy, pre-mommy brain. These days we we are schedule slingers. We shoot from the hip at a moments' notice. Which is sometimes a really good thing. But when all we do is shoot form the hip, it leaves us feeling completely drained and exhausted at the end of the week. Then before we know it, a month has gone by since we felt rested or intentional about anything in life.
This has by far been the biggest adjustment to working. I can't be so cavalier with my time, I have to make it count. Because what I do with my time turns into what our family lives in all week. Without being intentional we're left with a dirty kitchen, kids in pajamas all day erryday, and my best dinner intentions still frozen in the freezer at 5:30pm. I know we haven't taken on too much, there is plenty of time for all the things that matter...if we do it well, with intention and we protect the decisions we make.
When do I need to sit and work? Plan it. When do we need some fun and friends? Put it on the calendar. When do we want to rest? Block off some Tullos family black out dates. When do I need to sit and "Keep typing until it turns into writing"? Priorize, plan, and protect.
So, not anything crazy deep today folks. Just the muck and mire of real life and the battle to tame the jolly green calendar giant. Soon and very soon I'll be gettin all deep and introspective and .....#wincingfaceemoji vulnerable #laughcryingemoji.